Joy

I would write you a long letter to tell you how i feel and what it feels like to be lonely. But in the end, this is not a love song, i can’t compose the sad melancholic notes for you to play in any other rainy afternoon anymore, not without me.

I don’t know where to begin, i feel too lonely that i would spending time eating breakfast and turning on a video, any video so there would be voices inside the house. I enjoy my alone time too much, too much that i feel lonely, even with someone else by my side. I would go out, i would meet new people, but i don’t know what i am doing, how do i suppose to feel and where should i go next. I am drained and tired. You would hate me so much hearing me saying this again, I am not who you see. This feeling is eating me up, killing me inside, I would sit still for hours, thinking, doing nothing. I am irritated, anti social, mean. And you write me a letter, tell me to go out and meet people? Good opportunity my *ss. I am totally lost, and i am telling you this, i am about to ruin my life forever. Nothing would be the same anymore. Every night i go to bed crying, silently, loudly, obviously, hiddenly. I lost myself again, and i don’t care about me anymore.

Might you send me the joy from where you are?

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The violin man

Green bag, brown eyes

The violin man is walking under the rain.

Music plays in his mind,

He heads up with his heart.

Downpour, thunder,

Lightning strikes in the sky under.

Rhythm pours down on the ground

His heart does nothing but surrenders.

The violin man,

Walking in the cosmos,

Playing for the mascots,

Carrying a wet melody and his heart right on his sleeves.